Clapicap

After years of trying to be a rhythmicly-inclined, participating audience member, I have finally come to terms with the fact that I just can't clap when I'm supposed to. I consistently find myself clapping to a different beat as everyone else in the venue, and when I notice it, I have to stop, watch everyone else for a few claps to see when they're clapping, and then jump back in, on-beat. It feels a little like trying to jump in between twirling double-dutch ropes. I was never particularly good at that either.

It could be worse, I suppose. I am at least clapping rhythmically, if off-beat, exactly opposite of everyone else. I could be unable to keep any rhythm at all, meaning that I could never get back on beat with people at any point. As it is now, if I really focus, I can eventually get to the point of blending in with the crowd. I think there is some sort of life symbolism here...

I don't know what to blame this opposite-clapping tendency on. Is it because I sang a lot of spirituals at vespers in high school and people at the sing-a-long were often trying to set themselves apart by clapping in interesting ways? Did I just develop a unique clapping style at that formative age, by association? Or is it because of "Dub Sundays" at our house, where I hear a whole four or five hours of dub music, which emphasizes the off-beat? Or is it just because I'm so unique that I have a hard time going along with the crowd?

I realized half way through this post that I could have actually called this problem that I have a "handicap" since it involves my hands misfiring. People might not have gotten the pun, but I would have laughed about it to myself every time I re-read this post. Instead, I broke out the word "clapicap" (which came to me one night as I was laying in bed, half-asleep), which probably no one will get until they get to this paragraph, but I became obsessed with the perceived cleverness of it and then couldn't walk away from it. "Clapicap" doesn't hold up as well in the light of day, but I'm comitted to it now and have decided to try and work it into today's vernacular.

Let that be a lesson to you all -- the words you think up half-asleep may not be the best tools on your workbench. Clap on!